Monday, November 29, 2010

Am I a New Yorker Yet?

Love Birds at the Empire State building in '08 (see #2)
Last week I watched Nate Berkus' show for the first time (on recommendation of my mom) and saw the blogger from Six in the City sharing her children's rooms. I had come across Michelle's blog before but forgot to bookmark her site so I was glad to find it again. 

She and her family of 6 moved from Colorado to NYC and she chronicles their lives on her blog. (You can read about her Nate experience here.) 

Anyway, I was going through her old posts and saw she posted an unsourced list titled "You Know You're a New Yorker If . . ." and I wanted to share it with our readers (I've highlighted the ones that apply to me):


You know you're a New Yorker if....

1. You say "The City" and expect everyone to know that this means Manhattan.

2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty or the Empire State Building.

3. $50 worth of groceries fit in one paper bag.

4. You can get into a four hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park at 3:30 on the Friday before a long weekend, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.

5. The subway map makes sense to you.

6. You think the subway should never be called anything prissy, like the Metro.

7. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you bilingual.

8. You've considered smacking someone just for saying "The Big Apple."

9. Your door has more than two locks.

10. The most frequently used part of your car is the horn.

11. You consider eye contact an act of overt aggression.

12. You call an 8' x 10' plot of patchy grass a yard.

13. You consider Westchester "Upstate."

14. You live/work in a building with a larger population than some American towns.

15. You walk faster than some people run.

16. You see nothing odd about the speed of an auctioneer's speaking.

17. You're paying $1,500 for a studio the size of a walk-in closet and you think it's a "steal."

18. You've been to New Jersey twice and got lost both times.

19. You pay more each month to insure your car than most people in the US pay in rent.

20. You haven't seen more than twelve stars in the night sky since you went away to camp as a kid.

21. You go to dinner at 9pm and head out to the clubs when most Americans are heading to bed.

22. Your closet is filled with black clothes.

23. When foreigners ask directions, you are nice to them. When other New Yorkers ask directions, you ignore them.

24. You pay $5 without blinking for a beer that cost the bar 28 cents.

25. You take fashion seriously.

26. When you pass a celebrity on the street, you don't go to pieces.

27. You have 27 different menus next to your telephone.

28. Going to Brooklyn is considered a "road trip."

29. America west of the Hudson is still theoretical to you.

30. You've stopped thinking about how many hands touched the subway pole.

31. You're suspicious of strangers who are actually nice to you.

32. You haven't cooked a meal since helping Mom last Thanksgiving.

33. You take a taxi to get to your health club to exercise.

34. Your idea of "personal space" is no one actually breathing on you.

35. You have a minimum of five "worst cab ride ever" stories.

36. You don't hear sirens anymore.

37. You've mentally blocked out all thoughts of the city's air quality and what it's doing to your lungs.

38. You run when you see a flashing "Do Not Walk" sign at the intersection

39. You're in the background of a tourists' photo.

40. You use the rats in the subway tracks to tell you when the train's approaching the station

41. You move up one block to steal the cab from the person waiting for it below you

42. Your doorman is Russian, your grocer is Korean, your deli man is Israeli, your building super is Italian, your laundry guy is Chinese, your favorite bartender is Irish, your favorite diner owner is Greek, the watch seller on your corner is Senegalese, your last cabbie was Pakistani, your newsstand guy is Indian and your favorite falafel guy is Egyptian.
 


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